(Un)Doing

“I just – I think I’ve always been polyamorous, and it makes so much sense. I want to be with both of you. I want to make this work. Is that crazy?” (39)   I read Carmen Maria Machado’s In the Dream House as part of a graduate course on queer of color critique. The experimental memoir has found quite a huge following and rightly so, given the ways in which the author places herself within a complex assemblage of queer histories and narratives, their slippages and (mis)readings. This was the first time that I came across a memoir that drew so heavily from familiar queer tropes and theories of knowledge. In short, it blew me away. However, as I kept reading reviews that unanimously appreciated the generic interventions, I realized that nobody was talking about aspects of the book that left me somewhat disappointed – its representation of polyamory and anger.  Early in the memoir, I almost wanted to believe Machado’s partner even though I was aware that she is likely to be portr...

Prologue Academia, whether in the US or India is a deeply exclusive space, available to a select few. These few are often picked and pruned on the basis of ‘merit’ which is a pre-legitimizing step toward any production of knowledge. Often liberal students, in particular perform wokeness in order to legitimize their scholarship or appear subversive on social media platforms. I am guilty of perpetuating this performance by seeking to publicize my attempts to address my casteism and access points within academia and beyond. This piece of writing is an attempt to engage with fellow upper caste people by redoing the models provided by Devon W. Carbado  and  Peggy McIntosh . Of course, Hindu upper castes are diverse groups but as historically privileged communities, each one of us benefits by keeping Dalit and Bahujan voices in the margins. Confession as Performance In 2019, I asked my Jawaharlal Nehru University (JNU) course instructors, NM and PB about the re...